What if my spouse files for divorce first?

You may feel that your spouse has the upper hand by filing for divorce first, but they don't. In NC, you must simply respond to their complaint for divorce within 30 days of receiving it or request an additional 30 days respond if you need more time This will give you time to hire an attorney if you do not agree with the claims in the divorce complaint.

Responding to Divorce 

When you respond, remember to admit or deny each allegation in his complaint. Then request any alimony, post-separation support, and distribution of the marital property otherwise you'll lose rights to each claim. This is your chance to inform the court of all of the ugly things your spouse has done to you throughout the marriage (not while you were separated). But remember, once you start slinging the mud, it will be thrown right back at you should there be a hearing. Speak with an attorney to determine which issues the court will consider and only include those facts. 

Generally, the court will want the custody of the children born from the marriage to be resolved with the divorce. Otherwise, the court must be informed that the custody proceedings are ongoing and will be resolved in the near future. Child support can be requested at any time after you all separated.See our other blog posts for more information about requesting child support.

If your marriage was broken up because your spouse had an affair, you may also have a claim against the other man/woman. For more information about these claims, Alimony and Post-Separation Support check my other blogs using the links provided. Responding to a divorce may require financial affidavits, motions, and hearings so contact my office if you have questions at (919) 321-6569, Nastasia@KisalaWatkins.com, www.kisalawatkins.com.